the best sunset…

If you have hung around this blog for about, oh let’s say 3 minutes, you will know that I post many – as in “mucho many” – images of sunsets and sunrises. I am consistent, if not boring.

So, this past week, my wife and I have been enjoying a vacation on the Gulf Coast of Florida. As you imagine, the week here has afforded many opportunities to capture spectacular sunsets. And I did take too many photographs.

Before I share those, I thought I would share a post about the last sunset we saw together. I spent so much time taking pictures during the week, that on our last night at the beach I decided to be present to my bride, and present to the setting sun. I am so glad I did. 

Sunset was around 7:25 PM. We sat down around 7:15 PM…ish. From this point, this is what I remember:

We placed our seal level chairs right at the edge of the gentle Gulf waves as they splashed over the white, baby powder sand and washed over our feet. I think “sea level chairs” is the correct technical term. They are very low to the ground. I know this because of the forklift that was used to help me get out of my sea level chair.

We angled our chairs – maybe the correct term is, “I dare you to get up chair” – just right so we would have a perfect view of the water and the sun as it made its descent towards the horizon.

There was a gentle breeze. This was unusual because each day this week was based on a weather template that included very hot and humid conditions, bright, blazing sunshine, and air molecules that were not permitted to move.

When we sat, there was a golden path stretching from our feet right to the edge of the horizon, just below the sun, reminiscent of Dorothy’s Yellow Brick Road, only with more waves and seagulls.

At times, it appeared as if the sun was shooting out this… tractor beam that would soon draw us in its light to meet the great star on the horizon. Then, a bird would catch my eye, and when I looked again, it appeared like the path was being created by… us! Like these impossibly close to the white, baby powder sand chairs were emitting a path of their own for us to follow. Whether it was the sun, or our powerful chairs, the beauty was hypnotic to experience.

This was because the gold highway cut straight through indigo blue water… no, wait… it was a blue-ish color with tints of green hues and dark small ripple shadows created by the breeze. I can’t say that I have ever seen water that color before. The water was not reflecting the color of the sky. The Gulf was creating its own magic with wavelengths of light.

The soundtrack to all of this was the beautiful ostinato of the swoosh and bubble-gurgling of the small waves, accompanied by the erratic, staccato calls of the particular kind of seagulls at this beach. I know as much about seagulls as I know about sea level chairs, so I can’t tell you the name of the musical ensembles and their performances. I imagined it would be what Stravinsky would write if he wrote a composition entitled: “The Rite of Sunset on Siesta Key.”

As the sun descended closer into the water, the people enjoying a stroll on the beach would stop. Some would look. Others would take out their phones. I did not judge them.

We kissed as the last, tiny, marble sized ember disappeared into the end of the day. Somewhere it was dawn.

are we free

opened your eyes
got out of bed
but are you awakened
exercised
a protein drink
from the blender
but did you remember
to feed your soul
to workout
the stuff in your heart
that you took to bed last night

the morning routine
out the door
traffic and weather report
looks grim
you steel your mind
and shut the door
telling yourself
that you are fine
another sip of coffee
but did you remember
to feel something
that you know is there
to understand yourself
just a little bit more
being and doing
doing and being
more
you and i know
there is more
than the deadline
more than all this activity
did we lose ourselves
more likely
we numb ourselves
away from pain
and disorientation
keep the radio on
get busy and fill the schedule
it’s helps to drown out the noise
of all that’s in my head
maybe i should have stayed in bed

put the keys on the counter
there’s nothing in the fridge
it was a good day at the office
on the worksite
on my shift
i think i impressed… someone…
anyway
i suppose it was
just another day
there’s something still inside…
wait…

why am i crying...
i must be tired
or a bit confused
maybe a drink
will clear out my head
hulu and netflix
aren’t helping tonight
how long have i been staring
at this parade of options

was i crying tonight

maybe it was the traffic
it was a long day
i think i’ll go to bed
and try again tomorrow
to shake this restless sorrow
being doing
doing being
am i living
am i awakened
am i free

are we free

i’ll choose being

a misty morning
a cup of joe
a reader's digest prayer
i gotta go
still doing
...something
still going
...somewhere
all this thinking
has got me
...swirling
...sinking
...unfurled
before unexamined winds

wait
i tell myself
to take it slow
to ponder
to wonder
do i know
who i am
am i present
in this moment
i'll choose being
let the doing go
and remember
to stay in
in the midst
of a misty
morning
and just
listen
to the music
of the stillness
i'll sing along
a wordless song
entering this
eternal moment
letting go
of shadows
as the light
rises in my soul
who knows
where this moment
will lead
if i listen
and trust
if i surrender
all that i think
i must do
and live in the light
and stay
right here
then maybe
i'll be
free
from the shadows
of doing
and going
i want to meet
my true self
and
just be
me