to deny the brokenness the darkness the sin is to close our eyes and turn away from injustice from all the craters where schools once stood
is to place our hands over our ears to escape the tears carried on wailing waves on too many streets
is to cover our lips and become statues with utterless words screaming silently injecting our hearts with the novocaine of indifference after all what can we do really
we slingshot around the moon while shots ring out in the southside in the middle of the east on midwest streets unable to speak we cling to the songs of our tribes we can deal with that vibe
it's just too hard to try to understand i clasp my hands kneel down and pray for our enemies for our adversaries for our leaders to stay in a place of grace towards all life that mercy might reign for each child and soldier and mom and dad amen amen
God show us the way Kyrie eleison God come near today Christe eleison heal here today Kyrie eleison hear us we pray Christe eleison have your way in us we pray Kyrie eleison
i’m on a road i think i’m in control i think i know where i need to go i think i can see i think i can find my way back home i think there’s nothing behind me so why am i surprised at the tears in my eyes trying to be free while looking for a sign to ease my mind as i struggle to leave behind all the troubled times i carry in my soul things said and done they take a toll make me want to run but i choose to stay and follow the Way i sing of amazing grace i sing through my tears of a perfect love that drives away fear as the rain plays a melody reminding me that i am not in control but i’m safe in the shadow of the wings of His love as i travel on my way home
where is heart of the church the part that heals and feels pain and seeks to secure the good of the poor the stranger the unnoticed we pursue innovation but we need renovation of the inside of our soul the content of our heart so we can be a part of redeeming all that fell and all the hell in and around us as well
it is time to rebuild to be still to make a decision of the will to put on the Lord Jesus clothed in grace we move into the world that God so loved that he gave and embrace the stranger welcome the foreigner we face our flaws surrender our rights and set our sights on washing feet extending a hand we stand as ambassadors of the Way and we stay we forgive today we live not for ourselves but for those in need for those who cry and die alone for those who cry without a home
what has gone wrong that we have become a resounding gong we sing all those sunday songs and harbor hate hold a grudge belittle our spouse to name just a few and hide in the house of our pride we mock and scorn an opposing view and then we lock our soul in the rigid soil of i must win and we stew in the cauldron of our sin
Holy Spirit enter into the dark hidden sins for we are clanging cymbals who serve and sing and teach we study read and systematically arrange our grand theology and solve the mysteries give knowledge increase but we are just running from what is the greatest of these we are nothing without love
renovate our mind restore our heart we have made such a mess let us be people of kindness taking our place in rhythms of grace walking talking and loving as if we really believe that he has Risen
we cry right to life for every child and then only silence meets death in the streets and how can we silence the cries of motherless children a father watches the world watch his son murdered and we plunge further into fear and anger this country is my home but i feel like i want to run away from home what do i do with this groan inside my chest there is death in the streets human dignity meets ice cold cruelty and our leaders are silent right left all are bereft of conscience or soul no leader speaks out against death in our streets so everyone shouts and rightly so when elected criminals accept criminals to gun down beat down and drown the best of us you wear a mask and you spread disease carnage and hate as freedom fades please can’t you see stop wait don’t you recognize human dignity liberty is killing the free there is death in the streets O GOD there is death in the streets
like trying to hold the sands of the shore moments slipping away swallowed by tide and time like jumping high to swing from the clouds only to fall through the sky i tried to keep a moment or two
like a sunset over a soybean field or at the end of the road or a monochrome lighthouse showing the way to giant icicles on climbing day or two little girls on a summer swing with nana in the middle all is well or a grand city that rises and falls while a grand old bridge anchors it all or our two sons walking by the river or coffee starlings dancing in the air safe from the wind farm or the fire in the sky above a river flowing like time through fields and towns and seasons and lives until it joins the the moments in the sea and sand that still are slipping through my hands
if i were only able to walk i would roam to the sea to the top of the mountains and to the deep forest trees if i were only able to run i would chase the sunset win the race to the sunrise run after all the colors of the skies and if i could fly well if i could fly and soar i would explore the world with the power of my wings as i listened to the sky colors sing never again to walk or run i would fly with the sun ascend to the stars and oh the songs i would sing as i fly and carry the moon on my wings
sometimes i need to find the time and silence to unwind these coils of lies these shackles of shame and the commotion in my soul so i sit in slow motion while i name each derision and consciously make the decision to breathe in the Light of the World and exhale all these false tales that shield my heart from receiving the love on the Cross He is bleeding for me losing His life to save my own taking my sin calling it His own this Christmas child a King has come to reign through love and set me free from the insanity of my own making so like these winter trees i’ll surrender the leaves those colors were so nice but it’s just a show so i’ll let them go and die to what i think i know will set me free and stay here in the mystery of winter’s necessary death it won’t last long so with each breath i’ll wait and sing a song to the Christmas King as He works in my soul and rights all wrongs He is my healer my story writer and life giver i’ll wait while He does some slow motion mending old things must have an ending to make room for the new
i wonder what she’s praying for she’s pleading for she’s kneeling for i wonder what this child of God is asking of her Lord
perhaps for peace inside her soul and in this world and in this world perhaps for peace inside your soul won’t you plead with her now
perhaps for love inside her soul and in your heart and in your heart perhaps for love inside her soul won’t you plead with her now
i wonder what she’s praying for she’s pleading for she’s kneeling for i wonder what this child of God is asking of her Lord
perhaps for rest from all her pain from all her pain from all her pain perhaps for rest for you and me from all the pain we feel
perhaps for pardon from her sins from her sins from her sins perhaps for pardon for your sins won’t you implore with her now
i wonder what she’s praying for she’s pleading for she’s kneeling for i wonder what this child of God is asking of her Lord
i wonder if we all could kneel we all could kneel we all could kneel i wonder if we all could kneel and join her right now cry out with her now be humble with her now be a child of God right now
when was the last time you walked across the noise in your life and journeyed into the depth of you
when was the last time you just were still and present to your soul your longing your sorrow your joy your hope your anxiety your darkness
when was the last time you closed your eyes and settled into your spirit named the pain let the tears carry away the sorrow
when was the last time you heard your voice when it tore down another soul did it leave you broken did it stab your heart
when was the last time you surrendered you admitted your limits faced your shadows let pride fall away in humility
when was the last time you said thank you i love you i was wrong please forgive me i need help
when was the last time you leaned into your ordinariness you opened your heart to your strengths and weaknesses you listened to feedback you didn’t defend yourself
when was the last time you were you not as you think you are but listened to others and how they experience you
you are an ocean a vast sea of dreams of loss laughter weeping of love fear perseverance sin of cowardice strength power kindness of impotence clarity valor uncertainty and so much more
you are human created by God loved by God seek Him rest in Him receive His love live in His grace receive His forgiveness be alive in Him He knows full well you are human
so let’s talk of autumn mornings falling into my consciousness sunny skies shaking off the midnight rain while coffee murmurations dance in my eyes and i come into focus crawling out of my dreams stumbling towards awareness senses trying to make sense of the blue painted sky and those tiny beads of coffee are they escaping the scalding dark amber sea or just singing to the Creator’s design the indescribable unmistakable aroma is fresh and new and tells old stories it is a starling moment and i don’t really know what to make of it so i make my escape with the coffee beads and enjoy the view
rutakintome pictures 
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