cloudrise

no sun today
and that's ok
i won't tell the clouds
to go away
they can stay
it's a cloudrise day
dear cloudrise
help me feel
the sad in me
and to be real
and just be free
to be
sad
pensive
gray
apprehensive
stay here with me
there is beauty
in the shadow
longing in the sky
questions in my soul
sometimes all i know
is i don't know why
it's overcast
and colorless
and with a sigh
the teacher said
everything is meaningless
so i just breathe
just
breathe
so help me wait
in this pale dawn
help me to see
that i belong
to You
though the light is dim
i still see Him
and i will remain
still
quiet
hopeful
one day
no tears
one day
no fear
one day
all will be right
all will be Light
until then
my tears
will help me welcome
this cloudrise

starved rock fall

Starved Rock Sate Park, in Utica, IL, is always fun to visit, but in the Fall it can be just breathtaking. Situated along the Illinois River, it is a welcome contrast to the soybean fields and corn fields that dominate the landscape in this part of the midwest.

still as the tree

all the color will soon fall
and the barren trees will sing
cold and wind snow and ice
will paint the boughs with chilled beauty
as leaves are tossed
and lost are the
dried and cracked memories
of hues and tones
that proudly shouted
i am here

let's welcome winter
when it enters our souls
sometimes what we think is gold
needs to fade
be swept away
in the wind of the Spirit
may we bend and break
let proud color and hues
fall in surrender

self must fade
and give way to the dark
long
nights
He will hold us tight
through the cold
and the questions
and the monochrome feelings

we must stand
still as the tree
and wait for life
to start again
in His time
His way
His truth
His life
will spring
for we wait
and in the waiting
He is present
we wait
He is comfort
He is love
we wait
in
His
love

a prayer

dear Lord
when i am restless
let the tranquility
of your Spirit
the comfort of your word
the light of your love
be my peace
and still my stirring
when i am anxious
let the power
of your grace
the assurance of your sovereignty
the goodness of your will
warm the frozen fear
i feel inside
release the heart shackles
and settle my thoughts
in the river of your presence
when i am triggered
angry
let your mercy
help me remember
how much is broken in me
let your justice
be the end of my longing
let my heart be open
to you and this world
send me
as your loving healing presence
as i receive your love
and your healing
when i am lost
bring me home
when i am so sad
that light seems a memory
and hope a forgotten song
reorient my mind
reset my spirit
help me see
that the suffering is but a moment
that all i long for
awaits in your house
no more tears
no need of light
or sun
no darkness
thank you
my dear Lord
thank you

what i saw at starved rock

My day job is as a worship pastor. I have the privilege of working alongside a fantastic team of leaders and friends. Our team culture includes celebrating each other’s birthday. Each year we head out to Starved Rock State Park (a real gem of a place in the midst of the Midwestern plains) when my birthday celebration comes around. These images are some of what I saw today. Thanks for stopping by.