i know it’s been a long sad sad song and it seems like winter will go on and on i’ll stay here with you in the cold in the dark until we see the new
and in this shadow of death i’ll stay by your side and if it seems that spring is all around but it's not in you a colorless world endures i’ll sit with you cry with you listen to all your angry words until the shadows fall and the flowers return
so if for you this day brings sorrow upon sorrow just another monochrome morning let’s find Him together and believe together that on this steep and narrow road there is tomorrow
and when you cry i won’t ask why and if you ask me how long you’ll be in this sad sad song i could tell you but i’d probably be wrong but i promise I’ll stay and in the dirt and in the dark and in the cold and in this timeless pain we will find new life together
opened my eyes some time at the gym took a look inside silence and stillness with Him and the eastern sky beckoned with colors and i don’t know why at times i want to hide and don’t want to discover i’d rather not uncover the true that’s in me
i need to confess these silhouettes that i present as real why do i fight why can it be so hard to walk towards the Light and be healed and stand in His grace i know shame goes away don't have to hide my face in the welcome of His mercy
shine oh please shine in me i do what’s old in me and don’t do from what i claim is new so please shine and let this new day remind my heart my soul my mind that you are with me you are beneath me before and behind me you are all around me i’ll take another step toward the light not by sight by faith i’ll wait because you are with me
do you see the beauty all around you a dazzling sunrise colors and clouds singing out loud abandoned joy dancing across the sky
are you stilled in wonder at the edge of forever as melodious crashing waves meet the coarse sand beneath your feet when the morning sky touches your soul and you do and don’t know why tears appear and for a moment it’s all okay
and when you say goodbye to another day are you at rest is there peace in your mind as the sun meets the sea are you free are you free to feel all your sorrows make space for your pain see the hope of tomorrow when colors and clouds will see unending days that chase all the shadows of your heart away and all the loose ends of your crazy life story will end in the glory of lux aeterna
so be still love well just take another step away from the shame eternity covers your soul breathe into your worth abandon the lies confess your wrongs step into every sad song and just be willing to make space for the Way the Truth the Life lux aeterna will come for you so be still and love well
we used to gather to remain in the vine neighbor sister brother mother father singing our songs Kyrie eleison standing room only we were searching for Holy, Holy, Holy in a time of upheaval we found comfort in the cathedral of our hearts in the neighborhood sanctuary
candles prayers stained glass windows used to tell our stories guiding us toward glory dazzling testimonies told in fragile colors we were lost but we found each other and we found our heavenly Father Kyrie eleison
now just silent songs unsung melodies broken monochrome glass and look the vines enter in perhaps searching for souls maybe a prayer or two God make all this old to be new and begin in me please, Lord tell a story of your glory through all that is shattered in me as i sing the ancient song
the tension between making earthbound choices and setting my heart on things above
the tension between reputation protection and other-centered living
the tension between my anger and grace
the tension between forgiveness and revenge
the tension between my faith and loss and pain and my restless soul
the tension between being an image bearer and my shame
the tension between my title and my actions
the tension between crossing the bridge and playing it safe
the tension between myself and myself
the tension between the darkness and the light inside this heart of mine i fall i soar take flight only to stumble and cry for healing and why is it feeling like nothing makes sense at least sometimes nothing makes sense for there is a time for everything under this radiant sun time to take a step of faith He is not done i’m not at home so sometimes it doesn’t make sense
sing a canticle with me a little music a melody to try and defy all this gravity that will soon silence the tune of my life and i’ll be done with all this strife
when you press a key a silent symphony will rise and the veil will be removed from my eyes
oh to be free and be at rest one day when this instrument has seen it’s years all will be new no more tears its true
so sing out loud i was lost now i’m found and peace will be my everyday i’ll let go of all that i can see i will be free dismantled and transformed
in the endless Light i’ll join the endless song and all my days will be a canticle of praise will you come with me what do you see in the eternity He has placed inside let go of pride and sing a canticle with me a little music a melody let’s defy all this gravity
like a black sea stretching out before me all this mystery of what is yet to be all that i cannot see
like a black sky slowly descending over me telling shadow stories all i cannot hide a dark gray canopy made up of all my whys
oh Lord and Light guide me on my way help me navigate this story through the night waiting for the day longing for all made right for the unseen real to replace what all the senses feel
like a dark wave swallowing up my soul all the doubt and shame why must it be this way growing old is growing close to a different shore to so much more than the sum of my failures or anything labeled a success it’s all just a mess
oh Lord and Light i’m grateful that you gave me sight for this mess that i call my life for you carried me you saw me you ransomed me so i’ll follow you i’ll turn to you surrender to you and let you tell me who i am for you are love and far above this darkened sky and far below this blackened sea your glory and light your power and might the Lord and Light is with me in me all around me
sometimes i wonder where it all came apart where the promises and love songs withered and sighed the radio station otherwise known as our lives just plays static the noise of our brokenness the crackle of our selfishness
sometimes i wonder where all that love went to hide where the feelings and tryings the caring that was dying before our once hope filled eyes is that love buried beneath the winter of our self-protection will there ever be a springtime of affections sunshine to melt the hardness to take back all the words that tore apart the fragile fabric otherwise known as our lives do shreds of tenderness remain i see tattered threads of holding hands i think i can make out a long lost embrace
sometimes i wonder if all these thoughts colliding in my mind can make sense of anything at all why did i say that why didn’t i tell you why did i hide why didn’t i leave you alone why did i remain silent why did i scream i have so much on repeat in my head longing to find that clue that tiny missed detail to unlock the best of us
i love you i said it but you saw through all i insisted was true and i couldn't carry the weight of what it meant to be we us together our true selves as one in the story otherwise known as our lives
your grandchild’s giggle a warm smile from a stranger an embrace from the one you love you just want some things to last
a walk beside the sea the scent of falling leaves a comforting glance for your sorrow you just want some things not to go too fast
a melody that makes you cry someone saying i forgive you sweet vienna fingers with some coffee you just want some things to not slip into the past
a frigid cold morning sky whose design and colors takes your breath away couldn't think of a better way to start and end a day than losing myself in the beauty swimming in the artistry trying to take the whole sky in my arms you just want some things to stay you want some things to never go away coffee vienna fingers embracing the whole sky i just want some things to stay maybe never have to say goodbye
so what’s up cloudy winter day what have you got to say you remind me of me today a little chill a little gray the blues are above you somewhere high in the sky like the blues down inside me where i’m tired and i don’t want to try to pretend anymore that it’s sunny act like it’s all okay cloudy morning i hear what you’re trying to say
wait weep stay don’t keep it together just be feel don’t try to weather the weather rest pray chill gray stay connected to your Creator on this cloudy winter day
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