Tag: remembering

table thoughts

This blog has been quiet lately because we sold our home and moved to a new home! The new house is about 8 miles from our old house. We have been talking about downsizing for a few years now and… here we are! Packing up 20 years of living is crazy! We are grateful. Recently someone asked if I miss our old house. My reply, “Not at all.” However, I didn’t expect it to be so hard to say goodbye to our dining table. I helped the family who purchased our table and hutch by dismantling as much of the table as I could. When they took the table top out, the tears suddenly came.

a sturdy table
how many times
did we say grace
a setting
a space
for us just to be… us

conversations
confessions
interactions
admissions
revelations
contrition
a table is set
and becomes the place
where all the weight
of grave and gold
stories are told
and the broken bread
leaves a trail
leading to baby cries
spaghetti on the floor
broken family ties
a spilled drink
someone’s at the door
embraces of grace
birthday candles
graduation cake
love is a messy thing
it’s a long dangerous journey
of faith
hope
and love

homework and coffee
thanksgiving turkey
deep, endless laughter
tears
and the dread of uncertainty
are served alongside
a heap of understanding
conflict and honesty

i was surprised
when the tears
appeared as the table
was hauled away
i wondered
would they take away
the echoes of our conversations
the forgiveness that we found
the acceptance that we gave
the hurt that was served
the pain that was assuaged

it’s  called downsizing
but my tears
are singing
a different tune
my soul is filled
my hearts breaks
somewhere along
the fault line
of gratitude and lament
time to reset
the table of my heart
a place of welcome
peace
family
love

across our times

every now and then
a little boy
walks into the room
he was already here
he has never left
i just acknowledge
his presence

he sits
and listens
i share
memories
questions
doubts
fears
longings
words of comfort
and remorse
i sit
and listen
as he shares
stories
wishes
sorrows
giggles
secrets
tears
attempts to speak
all that was real

our meeting
is as a key to a lock
slowly arranging tumblers
a click or two closer
to opening a box
filled with light
opening a chamber of forgiveness
opening a door
that has been tightly shut
for too long
diminishing the shadows
and obscurity
of what it means
to be
sometimes
we just gaze
into each other
and see our soul
our converging wanderings
and there is calm
peace
between us
inside us
not because
all the mysteries
were explained
more because
across our times
we met
found solace
and remembered
who we are
who we are not
what to grasp
and what to set free