you are here

sometimes it doesn't feel like
anything is rising in me
held inside this gravity
on my knees i just can’t see
how
why
or when

life can be an in between
a canyon of waiting in the unseen
is there another side to this pain
another way to restore
loss
laughter
or song

O Light of the world color my soul
shine into these old tears
bring your radiance into my fears
and all this uncertainty
would you carry it for me
i believe you know the why
i trust you will show me how
i let this sunrise fill the eyes of my heart
and i cry for a morning with no more tears
no more pain
until then i wait and sing a sad song
to say thank you
i know
you
are
here

help me to let go

i’m trying
to let go
sometimes surrendering
doesn’t fit
all the shoulds i’m chasing

you see
i have this life equation
that should equal
the sum total
of all my expectations
of how it all should unfold
and then i see it unravel
everywhere and nowhere
i want to be

i’m trying
to let go
after all
we will all one day
let go of everything
so why do i try
to hang on to so much

like my pride
why didn’t you take
my side
i can only see
the me side
of you

like still holding onto
my right
and i’m right
and you’re not
i can’t see
how dark
and confusing
i make it for you

like when i hold onto
my disengaged attitude
pushing you away
silencing your voice
you’re not real
you don’t really know
what you feel
so let me
tell you

like when i hold onto
my fear
i don’t think
you’ll stay here
if you see the real
in me

God
help me
to let go
and to know
that even when i fall
that i am descending
into freedom
decreasing into the fullness
of who you made me to be

God
please help me
to
let
go

the Light

the Light chases us
even through
a dense darkness
a disorienting mist
that surrounds our efforts
to run towards anything
that helps us
to feel
loved
to feel
free

the Light waits for us
as we meander and stumble
through grief and sorrow
like a thick forest of tears
you cut your way through
angry branches
and leaves of sadness
but the forest
closes in
and muffles your weeping

the Light sees us
even when we can’t breath
and anxiety transforms the world
into a tiny box
from which
we cannot escape
and what we want
more than anything
is to be able
to stretch out our hand
so someone
can take hold
and guide us home

above
beneath
behind
in front of every cry
the Light

above
beneath
behind
in front of all your sorrow
the Light

above
beneath
behind
in front of all your fear
the Light

above
beneath
behind
in front of you
the Light
a hand extended
to guide you home
a warm embrace
to welcome you home

matthiessen state park

A collection of Fall beauty from Matthiessen State Park. This park features canyons, hiking trails, streams, and waterfalls. It is a jewel in the midst of the plains of the Midwest. Thanks for stopping by!

prelude to the winter snow

october you’re just teasing
but thank you
for those summer like breezes
i like your style
i love what I see
it’s just a little while
and then what’s to come
will be
you blaze and shine
with colors sublime
it’s a bittersweet show
but I don’t mind
this vivid prelude
to the winter snow
but until the chill
descends on hoodies
and we have to wear
pajamas with footies
i’ll sing with you
let you color my world
you always
fall with such grace
and suddenly
our crazy world
is a beautiful place

jewels in my soul

and there were threads in the garden
and there were stars in the leaves
and there jewels on the flowers
and there were diamonds in the webs
and there were threads in my mind
tethered to sorrow
beauty
lament
wonder
love
and there were stars in my heart
sparkling memories
regrets
dreams
loss
hope
and there were jewels in my soul
brilliantly reflecting
the promises
of my heavenly Papa
the redemption
of the Lamb
the deliverance
from the shadows
of my brokenness
and there were diamonds
all around
family
friends
love
companionship
a smile
an encouraging word
gratitude
melodies
light
beauty
song

summer’s passage

i wonder where summer is going
and why the hostas’ trumpets
wither in the song of the morning gold
the moisture saturated early september air
will soon surrender to hoodie worthy chilly days
and hosta trumpets will disappear
and silenced shrills that once inhabited
golden shells gently rest
bearing witness to the symphonies
that played endlessly on measureless summer days
but now summer’s bags are packed
the trees wait and will soon honor summer’s passage
tossing golden and crimson leaves
in a reluctant celebration
to the closing of summer nights and songs
and to welcome the crystal air of winter’s refining lament

it’s enough to just be you

take a breath and close your eyes
i’m praying that you’ll realize
that it’s enough to just be you
it will take time
but i know you will shine
so ease your mind and take my hand
i will help you stand and stay with you
i will listen to every word you say
i promise it will be okay
sometimes everything is gray
so that we can grow
into what we were made to be
and i know you will shine
it will take time
but you will realize
that it’s enough
to just
be you

labor day vibes

The day began with a beautiful sunrise, courtesy of the Illinois River.

Then my wife and I worked on a small wallpaper project in our main floor bathroom. No one was hospitalized, the bathroom looks great, and we are still married. The true test of a couple’s emotional health is their ability to finish a wallpaper project!

Finally, hopped on the Kawasaki and took a ride to the wind farms on this beautiful day.

Hope you have a wonderful week. Thanks for stopping by.

beneath a blanket of blue

i
lift
up
my eyes
to the
fields
and skies
and
let
this
fleeting
day
pass
away
another
moment
a shifting
hue
in an
instant
a crimson
glow
grows
beneath
a blanket
of
blue
this
choir
of
colors
quietly
slowly
lends
gentle
tones
to
feathered
clouds
above
time
softly
closes
the
door
as
i
whisper
prayers
of
awe
reverence
and
gratitude