a cup of coffee
in a little corner of my home
lights and shadows
remind me of what lies within me
darkness and light
love and hate
goodness and self-centeredness
the memories descend
life and love
family and friends
grace and peace
laughter and song
so many gifts
undeserved and plentiful
soon the wraith
of dim stories arrives
failures
loss
shame
and the quiet ache
of all things left undone
and of all that i have done
to others and to myself
i choose to surrender
to all the images
that so quickly float
through my mind
as i lift my gaze
in a little corner of my home
three crosses
Calvary
such an ugly place
of death
of pain
of sorrow
of suffering
and it is there
in the midst
of the darkness and light
of my life
it is only there
where the lies i tell
and the lies i believe
are exposed
where my shame is undone
in love and acceptance
where i trade my burden
for hope
mercy
love
and the lightness
of forgiveness
and i realize
He is here
with me
in a little corner
of my home
These are images from a recent road trip back to New York. We (my wife and I) made the trip to attend a memorial service and decided to head back to visit the area where we lived during our college days. We visited Briarcliff Manor, Tarrytown and Ossining, NY, and thoroughly enjoyed our trip down memory lane.
Regarding the images: ‘GW Bridge’ is short for the George Washington Bridge, connecting New Jersey and Manhattan. We take the Whitestone Bridge to go from the Bronx to Long Island. We enjoyed lunch at Horsefeathers, and the view of the amazing Tappan Zee Bridge, which connects Tarrytown, NY to Nyack, NY. The homes in Tarrytown and Ossining were 2 of the places we lived in after we were married while in college. It was fun taking in the sights of these old, beautiful towns!
so i woke up
and all the clouds
remind me of the words i said
oh God
the words i said
the anger in my head
so i woke up
and all the clouds
can’t hold the tears
that just rain down
down down
it hurts
and i don’t know why
oh those clouds in the sky
so i woke up
and all the clouds
press on my shoulders
and i manage to pray
oh God
i just want to be okay
just one day
can i be okay
one day
faith
help me to trust
that just behind
those clouds
Your promises still shine
help me to hear
the light of Your words
and rest
oh God i’m so tired
so i rest in You
hope
i choose to reach
beyond the now
one day
only light
and no more tears
so today
while i’m in the clouds
i place my hope
in You alone
in You alone
love
let me see
Your Light
let me know
Your promises
let me hope
that one day soon
all will be well
all must be well
because You
are Love
You are Love
so i woke up today
and all the clouds
remind me
that today right now
You are here
not hidden
so i’ll search for You
and make it through
this cloudy day
with You
with You
Soul distancing: the practice of separating your soul
from the day to day rush
the deadline driven exhaustion
the anxiety saturated social media
the identity robbing expense of living for someone's approval
the heart hardening fallout of unforgiveness
the countless heart deadening diversions
and instead
connecting to whatever it is that helps you to
s l o w d o w n
a walk on the shore... a hike...
sitting in stillness... prayer...
coffee and a good book...
you may discover what you are really living for and decide to change course
you may discover what you really worship and decide to reach higher in the affections of your heart and mind
you may discover an ocean of tears that were held back by your hardness becasue you need to be right
or you won't let it go
or you refuse to forgive
or because you know you need to confess and make it right
you may discover
in the stillness
the voice of God
I particularly love the winter shore. The lonely beach seems to have more to say during the “off” season. I enjoy the endless songs of the water as the waves crash, and the water spreads out in a desperate attempt to explore and experience more of what it’s like to be on land. The taste of cold, salty air…
rutakintome pictures 
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