Category: Uncategorized

a Good Friday meditation

Good Friday.
2026.
The Cross of Jesus.

What does the crucifixion and death of Jesus on the Cross say to our modern, latte driven, texting oriented, overscheduled lives?

One of my earliest memories as a child was the large Cross in the sanctuary of the church I grew up in. When I tell my story I talk about how I first heard God speak to me as I pondered the Cross. It was not an audible voice I heard. It was more like an understanding that gently covered me. Looking at the figure of an emaciated, gaunt, suffering Jesus nearly dangling on a cross is the most important moment and image any one of us will ever behold or contemplate.

It is there where the mystery of the love and mercy of God meets the sin and darkness in my soul. It is there where the whole world can find freedom and forgiveness and where God lifts the burden and pain of failure and shame from the back of our souls, and from the very core of our being.

I am not speaking of magic, or some metaphysical allegory that somehow heals my brokenness. The Cross is not a place upon which we toss our wishful thinking. Reject it, mock it, turn away from it in disbelief… its power and proclamation remains undiminished… unhindered:

He did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly.

He personally carried our sins in his body on the cross so that we can be dead to sin and live for what is right. By his wounds you are healed. Once you were like sheep who wandered away. But now you have turned to your Shepherd, the Guardian of your souls. – 1 Peter 2:23-25

The Cross is real. The suffering is unimaginable. In the course of human history no one has suffered like Jesus did. No one. Ever. Isaiah rightly describes Jesus and, apart from His grace and mercy, my response to Him. Our response to Him:

He was despised and rejected— a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief.
We turned our backs on him and looked the other way.
    He was despised, and we did not care. – Isaiah 53:3

And it is the suffering of Jesus that, even as a young boy, called from deep within me a profound and unstoppable hope.

Look at the Cross. Reflect on the suffering of Jesus. This is what the love of God looks like. As a boy, I remember the light from the candles in St. Raphael’s parish dancing on the face of Jesus. Hope in flashes of flickering light on the crucified Christ. Now, so many years later, I realize that one of the many gifts of the suffering of Jesus is the assurance that he knows my suffering. He knows our suffering.

Have you ever been falsely accused? I bet you didn’t like it. Have you ever heard a friend make a promise to have your back and to see you through to the end, only to have that friend leave you all alone. All of Jesus’ friends did that to him. Have you ever felt that aweful deep down ache because you were misunderstood? Have you ever been physically struck and hurt because someone else thought it was funny? Have you ever been made fun of? Mocked? Have you ever experienced anxiety? Jesus sweated drops of blood as he prayed to His Father to, …take this cup from me.

Jesus chose to suffer for you. Now we can look to Him and ask Him to guide us, give us grace  and help us in our suffering and pain. But we must follow Him. It is too easy to want resurrection – and all praise to God, for Jesus is alive. But the only road to life and the light of Christ is the road of suffering.

We must follow Him along the via Dolorosa. The release from our pain, the soothing of our anxiety, the healing of our bodies, the calming of our mind is along the path of darkness, uncertainty, disorientation, rejection and confusion. It is taking our Cross and following Jesus. It is kneeling beside Him in the garden and saying not my will, but yours be done.

Good Friday.
2026.
The Cross of Jesus.

Will you reflect on the Cross today? Will you see Jesus suffering for you so that you, in the midst of heartache, loss, anxiety, rejection, and sorrow, can also experience the hope and understanding of our loving Savior?

Over the course of my life it seems that Jesus has continually reminded me of the grace, love and power of the Cross.

There was a Cross above us on the day we were married.
I saw the Cross at the end of a pew in the sad remains of the church I grew up in.
I saw the Cross in a small wooden prayer room decorated with the prayers of God’s children.
I saw the Cross brightly break through a cold, winter morning.
I saw the Cross on Salvation Mountain.
I saw the Crosses that my mom placed all over her house. 
I saw the Cross in the midst of the tragic loss of life, when so much ended for so many.
I saw the Cross in a new sanctuary. Still speaking to listening ears.

Ponder the Cross of Jesus. Let the Man of Sorrows cover your sin and shame. Walk with Him… listen to Him… confess your sins to Him… receive His forgiveness… He. Loves. You.

together we are america

I cannot recall a time when I felt more proud and profoundly sad – to the point of weeping – at the same time.

My mother and father were not wanted in the white suburban neighborhood that was the cultural context of my home. I only found out as an adult that my parents experienced racism. In junior high and high school I was often called a “spic” and also experienced racism.

My parents and the beautiful, crazy, loving till it hurt, generous, loud, FUNNY, hard working, intelligent, beautiful Puerto Rican family that I was a part of was the song, dance, and light of my life. 

Dancing in the basement of my uncle’s house in the Bronx while LP’s spun Salsa music in the air are golden memories that I would love… just love to step into and experience once again… even if it was just 5 minutes to see what, as a boy, I could not fully comprehend: people filled with so much love and joy who were also familiar with heartache, tragedy, misery and pain.

And, if I could be there again… just for 5 minutes… I would embrace them all and thank them and praise them for all the goodness, kindness and love they gave to me. They certainly weren’t perfect… but they were present… to me, to each other, and they found solace and refuge in their culture. A culture that celebrates, rejoices, works so hard, laughs and loves. They understood that together we are family.

My mother and father are Americans who were born in Puerto Rico. In case you are not aware, Bad Bunny is also an American born in Puerto Rico. I am the first generation on my father’s side born in New York. I am also an American. I still remember the sadness in my mother’s eyes because she struggled to speak English. My mom and dad are the most American Americans that I will ever know. They never forgot who they were and the beauty and depth of the culture of La Isla del Encanto

For the past 2-3 weeks I have been listening to Bad Bunny’s Grammy Award winning album, Debí Tirar Más Fotos. The songs feel like the soundtrack of my life. I could not be more proud to be Puerto Rican.

I was told that we are “…one nation, under God, INDIVISIBLE with LIBERTY and JUSTICE for ALL.” We can only make that pledge with integrity if we make it our mission. We can only make that pledge with honesty if that is how we choose to live and love others, especially those from all the nations that make up our nation. It seems that our behavior and our chosen allegiances reveal a different pledge: “…a nation, under siege from within, with liberty and justice for some…”

When Bad Bunny ended his amazing performance with “Together We are America” and the parade of flags from Latin American nations I began to think of the nations that make up our nation. I see no reason not to celebrate and learn about the nations that make up our nation, because together we are America. I see no reason not to listen, empathize and give liberty and justice for those who are marginalized, forced to live in fear, or just trying to make their way because they struggle with English, because together we are America. I see no reason not to dance, sing and celebrate my heritage and culture in the land of the free(?) because together we are America.

Thank you, mom and dad, for loving well. Thank you for being brave, strong and true to who you are in the midst of racism and hatred. Thank you for making life not about those who hate, but about passing on your heritage and legacy of laughter and love.

One day, when God gives justice and all is made right, our nation’s flag and pledge will no longer matter. It will be irrelevant. All nations will surrender before the true King of Kings. All nations will bow before the majesty and splendor of the victorious Savior of the world. We can celebrate all nations now because the nations will be welcome in eternity. Not just one nation. All nations.

I did not see a temple in the city, because the Lord God Almighty and the Lamb are its temple. The city does not need the sun or the moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and the Lamb is its lamp. The nations will walk by its light, and the kings of the earth will bring their splendor into it. On no day will its gates ever be shut, for there will be no night there. The glory and honor of the nations will be brought into it.
Revelation 21:22-26

merry christmas

Dear WordPress family: wishing you all a joyful Holiday Season filled with light, love, and peace for you and yours.

a birthday evening in chicago

A few weeks ago we celebrated the 36th birthday of our oldest son in Chicago. We were married when we were 12, so we are not THAT old! 🙂 We enjoyed a wonderful dinner. It was my first time trying a tuna steak that was rare in the middle. Delicious! After dinner, our son suggested we take a walk over to the Up Room at The Robey, a beautiful Art Deco building built circa 1929. We were so glad we did! It was a beautiful summer evening in Chicago.

Thanks for stopping by.

life is a bit hectic…

…so I have fallen behind in posting some images that have been hanging out on my hard drive. These two are from a sunrise in my home town. I have taken many images from this spot. It’s just a short walk from our home. Does anyone else see what I see in that sky? Thanks for stopping by!

what then

if a person’s heart breaks into pieces
and gets lost is the dark abyss
of depression and grief
and no one is there
what will that heart believe
about the world
and those who say
i’m your family
your friend

if a mind is fractured
scattered shattered
and full of noise
and no one is there
to listen
to be close
to wait
as long as the storm lasts
until the light breaks the night
what will that mind understand
what will that mind believe
about people
about this world

if a person is at the edge
their heads
so heavy in their hands
their pulse impossibly accelerated
their body rigid and tense
every muscle screaming

stop

and no one is there
to hold them
hear them
believe them
what then
________________________

May is Mental Health Awareness month, at least here in the States. Do you need help? You are not alone. I don't want you to go another minute without assistance and encouragement. 
Contact a local counseling professional, a pastor, or feel free to contact me on the left side of my blog.

grateful

I took a picture of the pin oak in our front yard because I felt bad that I was cross with this beautiful tree. Usually, it keeps most of its leaves through winter, but this week it quickly surrendered many of its leaves to the breezes of the day. After a considerably long, reluctant dance with my rake, I looked up and saw this. I took a moment to join this beautiful tree, as we both enjoyed the cold, leaf scented air as the sky showed us how it would close this day. Grateful.

a thousand tides

waiting
keeping watch
searching
scanning horizons
i didn’t realize
that i was looking
for you all my life
waiting
for our
once upon a time
to begin
when i saw you
i ran to meet
you on the shore
of our journey
after all these years
i now know
i would choose to wait
and let a thousands tides
come and go
and let the lonely time
pass me by
if it meant
i could be near you
hear you say my name
yes i would
search for you
night and day
and
wait
this voyage called life
a perilous quest
under storms at night
and bright mornings of peace
living out vows
that we said
when we were kids
you’re still choosing to stay
beside me
i’m still choosing to stay
beside you
across all the wild wild seas
that are behind us
we found treasures
a guiding grace
that will lead us
a slower pace
that will ground us
a grateful space
that settles our minds
navigating
these later years
we get to wait
together
love
together
sitting here
with you
waiting here with you
remembering here
with you
we wait
for one day
the journey will end
until then
we get to wait
together
love
together
be
together
and in the waiting
practice staying
come what may
you’re still choosing to stay
beside me
i’m still choosing to stay
beside you
we
wait

have mercy

tragic
insanity
i
can’t
breathe

stunned
disbelief
heart
shattered

no
place
to
hold
any
of
this

sorrow
upon
sorrow
please
wake
me
up

darkness
wailing
misery
descending

i’m
so
sorry
wordless
pain
engulfs
everything

hands
on
my
ears
sill
hear
the
cries

hands
on
my
eyes
still
see
their
eyes

hands
on
my
mouth
still
see
the
screams

is
this
who
we
are
is
this
who
i
am

oh
God
of
mercy
please
have
mercy

we
are
all
falling
fallen

tumbling
crying
retching
dying

oh
God
of
mercy

please

have

mercy

mom

My mom passed away. She was 97. My mom and dad were married for 64 years. She has left a legacy of love… a rich, tender love, freely shared with family, friends and the stranger.