a gentle breeze kissed the trees and their leaves applauded with glee sunrise beams painted the fields the streams awakening colors dispelling the shadows oh Eternal LIght can you do the same for me you see i’m wrestling now with shadows deep sad sad songs keep echoing and i weep for these longings keep on singing and i can’t make out the melody all seems wrong where are the joyful songs will you shine on my mind running all these scenarios is a drain but the pain remains will you shine on my troubled heart mend all the jagged broken parts help me to start anew i will trust i will trust in You my Eternal Light
there is a desperate feigned beauty to a closed heart not present to pain like a tragic lullaby an inconsolable melody celebrating safety striving to look like peace reluctant to feel locked up in dark silence encased in emptiness
choose to feel to stay connected to what’s real stay in the pain even in the rain gifts are to be found don’t turn around lament all that is broken laugh as if it’s all okay cry because you know it’s not take a step of faith none of us is free from danger find a friend who will walk beside you and let you feel
taking time to just be on this gentle quiet morning by the sea
soothing waves share their melodies as soft hues of morning light fall upon the endless sand and fill my eyes with stilled wonder
i try to look down into the deep of my own heart and feel the sad songs find the gifts of grace stay in anger’s embrace pray for resurrection to race through the turmoil and the pain lift me higher again so i can return to You and in so doing return to me
slowly the luminance of the colors rise across the sky as the colors of love wash over me eternity is in my heart thankful for each crazy part of this thing called life
and i find that i’m choosing to let it all in i stand in the light while i’m feeling the pain that keeps falling like rain on my story again and the clouds crowd my soul so i let it all go carried on whispered prayers with hands pleading lifted in unspoken longings eyes searching for some kind of answer in this darkened light embracing the rain and the clouds and all the unseen running into the light as it reaches all that’s been perhaps a lament or two will see me through the paradox of this impermanent journey a time for everything and everything in time i’ll welcome the longing with singing celebrate the love with understanding that all is fading into unending yesterdays and the clouds crowd my soul so i let it all go and i’ll walk towards the light keep my eyes on things above and choose to love here below and let it all go through trembling whispers of faith until i find my way home with some amazing grace
remembering letting go surrendering finding slow winter’s cold a memory blooming color here comes summer seasons in my heart some things i can start again and some well they just are
moments in the sun will soon run away colors will fall winter will howl lonely branches will soon help me see
so i explore the seasons in my life some things must die some things bring so many whys
but with each blossom all this beauty wrapped up tightly waiting to spring i surrender let go and find some slow and sing
a slow meandering upon the ancient sands the sea reminding me how small i truly am and that’s totally okay
much more behind me than before me a few less steps remain the waves will sing long after my last breath
sometimes i just want to stop and join the clouds and sea just melt into the horizonless dance and stay listen and pray it can all feel so weary
still i journey on back to go forward reaching into the ocean of stories looking for that perfect shell listening for all is well remembering the glory still to come
yesterdays just fly away even memories are fading is anyone staying we are alone ever together with our life and with others we are alone
new life still all this strife new opportunity same entropy new start still in bed new attitude still no gratitude new insights still trying to fight new word still not listening new day same old ways new light still seeking shadows new colors same monochromatic soul new gifts same folded arms
for you
on this day
right now
new grace
boundless love
endless mercy
a Cross to bear
with an everlasting Companion
unmerited forgiveness
an endless sunrise
can be yours
receive
be centered
through surrender
be free
through confession
be at rest
through acceptance
come home
it is finished lay down your shame take up your hope lift up your head receive your identity and rise
we used to gather to remain in the vine neighbor sister brother mother father singing our songs Kyrie eleison standing room only we were searching for Holy, Holy, Holy in a time of upheaval we found comfort in the cathedral of our hearts in the neighborhood sanctuary
candles prayers stained glass windows used to tell our stories guiding us toward glory dazzling testimonies told in fragile colors we were lost but we found each other and we found our heavenly Father Kyrie eleison
now just silent songs unsung melodies broken monochrome glass and look the vines enter in perhaps searching for souls maybe a prayer or two God make all this old to be new and begin in me please, Lord tell a story of your glory through all that is shattered in me as i sing the ancient song
sing a canticle with me a little music a melody to try and defy all this gravity that will soon silence the tune of my life and i’ll be done with all this strife
when you press a key a silent symphony will rise and the veil will be removed from my eyes
oh to be free and be at rest one day when this instrument has seen it’s years all will be new no more tears its true
so sing out loud i was lost now i’m found and peace will be my everyday i’ll let go of all that i can see i will be free dismantled and transformed
in the endless Light i’ll join the endless song and all my days will be a canticle of praise will you come with me what do you see in the eternity He has placed inside let go of pride and sing a canticle with me a little music a melody let’s defy all this gravity
like a black sea stretching out before me all this mystery of what is yet to be all that i cannot see
like a black sky slowly descending over me telling shadow stories all i cannot hide a dark gray canopy made up of all my whys
oh Lord and Light guide me on my way help me navigate this story through the night waiting for the day longing for all made right for the unseen real to replace what all the senses feel
like a dark wave swallowing up my soul all the doubt and shame why must it be this way growing old is growing close to a different shore to so much more than the sum of my failures or anything labeled a success it’s all just a mess
oh Lord and Light i’m grateful that you gave me sight for this mess that i call my life for you carried me you saw me you ransomed me so i’ll follow you i’ll turn to you surrender to you and let you tell me who i am for you are love and far above this darkened sky and far below this blackened sea your glory and light your power and might the Lord and Light is with me in me all around me
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