i would like to shine bright as a sunny day and shimmer like a jacob collier song but i often find that old pride inside and i stumble and lose my way and it can go so wrong when the shame gets strong and i reach for a new identity no matter how i try i’m never free when i think i don’t need to be me
so i run back home to the lover of my soul it’s an uphill path the lies inside just laugh so i bring to my mind and heart the One who has kept me from the start
oh sing of the treasure of His love for me for you it shimmers and shines
His mercy shimmers and shines the Light of the world lives inside and He always shimmers and shines
where is the solace
when life only brings darkness
an achromatic sunrise
unable to chase shadows
a sunset that never leaves
where is the gentle breeze
when life storms around and within
can’t breathe the rain soaked air
while i try to put on a smile
the pulse rate of my soul diminished
where are the hands
cradling a countenance
when the lonely tears
are seeking an embrace
standing in the middle of the universe
i guess the view is nice
but no one is there
to share the stars
i’ve heard it said
there is a place
where melodies and harmonies
take flight
like lullabies that never say goodnight
music you can taste
and hold in hand
or pull towards your heart
music that covers you
with a blanket of love and grace
the softest peace
a delicate abyss of joy
so i run to this place
in the darkness and the storm
i lift up my eyes
when it feels i can’t breathe
i fall into faith
when the tears want to stay
i tell my story
and let the music fill in the gaps
the star maker knows
each page of sorrow
each gaze of wonder
the calming comfort of trust
if i’m in the
pain of the valley
or the delight of the clouds
the star maker
knows
my
name
he knows my now
and my yesterdays
my what is to come
i breathe in timeless hope
i fall into
a vast fissure of love and rest
another valley is near
but
He
is
nearer
another morning at the gym
felt good to get the workout in
good to move and feel alive
but then again
there's the stuff inside
this heart of mine
that needs to be revived
to beauty
wonder
peace be still
quiet surrender
and some delight
and some letting go
of my will
i really could use the shore
but who really needs the shore
i take that back
i guess i do
but having said that
i looked for
morning treasures
and this is
what
i
found
i found
a joy to the world star
shining in my garage
and tons of diamonds
in my backyard
it seems that
someone spilled
a bunch of green
and i don't really care
it's new life
it's spring
the winter has passed
the hollow spaces
between all branches
like the hollow caverns in my soul
will be filled with green
and red
and white
and iris purple life
and also
i happened to find
harry's pianese snitch
does that mean i win
i'm thinking yes
and then i saw
black diamonds
on the rear window
of the sedan
they're glistening
as they reflect
the light
i'm listening
and in my heart
all seems right
as i treasure
these delights
i'm open
to
the
Way
the
Truth
the
Life
In my previous post I indicated that we (my wife and I) were attending a spiritual retreat in the Chelsea neighborhood of New York City. After our last session today we were encouraged to experience delight. We decided to walk to the Chelsea Market, then walked the High Line to the Hudson Yards. These images are just a glimpse into an evening of delighting in New York City!
so i might as well
write about the clouds today
lately more than a few
have come my way
but
hey
why do i think
that it has to
always go
my way
clouds
gray
lately they seem to stay
these uninvited guests
well
even when i try my best
to pretend
they just won't rest
until tears reappear
tearing through
my gray
gray
mind
oh i wonder if
i will ever find
a way
through
all the clouds
and all
the
gray
oh cardinal
is there a prayer for me
wrapped up
in all your music
and melody
through the gray
the notes they fly
to find the light
they tell my soul
that it’s okay
to take a stroll
through
all the clouds
and all
the
gray
and just stay
wait
and
pray
uncertainty disorientation a gray shadow blankets the light confusion an opaque spirit descends in my mind and tries to dislodge hope from my soul it nearly succeeds
turn to the left turn to the right turn around move stay still speak remain silent try surrender everything matters and nothing does i can’t focus on the next step what kind of morning is this what kind of dawn haunts me
i think i’ll wait i choose to listen my Maker is near and He whispers through the diffused shadows of my fear He sings through the longing in my tears and in this moment nothing has changed the struggle remains so i yield to this moment and trust in His mysterious love
hey december
where did you go
did you take
the mistletoe
and what happened
to the eyes all aglow
light and trees
christmas melodies
how quiet
it all seems
well
christmas is only
356 days away
until then
i’ll choose to stay
in the silence
of winter’s embrace
i’ll welcome the stillness
and ponder the grace
that fills my heart
in the quiet start
of this new year
i choose to hear
the voice
of my Father in heaven
the grace
of His presence
the love
of His Son
hey december
it was fun
but living this life
is a serious thing
so i will sing
of His light in me
and remember
i can take december
and bring good cheer
to family near
and friends so far
dear God
thank you
dear God
thank you
for memories
of christmas melodies
and for right now
this day
this moment
for your presence
thank you
God
What can I give Him,
Poor as I am? —
If I were a Shepherd
I would bring a lamb;
If I were a Wise Man
I would do my part, —
Yet what I can I give Him, —
Give my heart.
- Christina Georgina Rossetti
To my WordPress family: Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! May this season of light and joy be filled with peace for you and yours. May your new year be seasoned with adventure, love and contentment.
rutakintome pictures 
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